I can’t remember a time in my life when I was home at the right time to watch The Oprah Winfrey Show. I only had vacation and sick days to watch Oprah. And even with my sporadic viewership, I learned to love her. To listen to her words. To try to do what the Oracle told me.
And she once saved my life. But I’ll save that story for another day.
Today, I’m saying goodbye to Oprah. I haven’t seen her show in years. I missed the final episode. Suddenly a huge vacuum in space opened. Who would tell it to me straight and give me positive affirmations? Surely, I needed her for these things. But she was gone.
I am subscribed to an Oprah email list and started getting messages from Oprah’s Lifeclass. Oprah started her own university and forgot to tell me about it. I’ve been missing class. Then I took a peek, and realized that the old Oprah, the one I loved, might be gone forever.
Oprah used to give advice on practical things. She was a regular person. She would admit to stealing hotel towels and eating an entire pie. Original Oprah wanted us to do the following things:
- Stop being racists.
- Get away from abusive relationships.
- Protect ourselves from crime.
This was the doom and gloom Oprah. The world was a bad place with , and we had to protect ourselves.
Oprah in the Middle
The Oprah in-between wanted us to do better. Be proactive. Pick ourselves up by our bootstraps.
- Stop overeating.
- Take care of our personal finances.
- Make peace with the past.
- Run a marathon.
This wasn’t enough. Oprah wanted us to change the world.
- Fill our days with positive self-affirmations.
- Know about the inner workings of our bodies, talk about poop, and change our health habits.
- Volunteer. Improve our communities.
- Embrace gratitude and joy.
That was fine for me in the past, but now I have to move on.
I have to say that I've enjoyed the journey. But the Oprah Lifeclass is where my journey ends. One of the lessons was “Things about aging no one ever told you.” A reminder about my impending turkey neck, age spots, wrinkles and deteriorating eye sight? Thank you, Oprah. You have now left me behind.
These new lessons read like we’ve all reached the same point. Like we've been with you from the beginning. You’ve forgotten that some of us are surrounded by dirty diapers and still want to eat an entire in one sitting.
You’ve forgotten that some of us are not practiced or confident enough in self-affirmations. Am I lovable, Oprah? How can I be when I don’t feel it? Goodbye, Oprah, goodbye. I will always be your friend.
So, I have given up my Oprah habit. She will be remembered fondly for first teaching me about Cole Haan shoes (that I never purchased) and the shape and consistency of a healthy poop. For those things I am forever grateful.
Between, now and the end of the year, I will teach my own life class. It will be a class for those of us who are triumphant one day and defeated the next. Should I call it Mortal Lessons? Active Inanimacy? Distraught with Joy?
There are seven weeks until the New Year. Do you think you can make a change in your life before December 31?